Confessions

I like the glugg glugg of red wine being poured,
the clipp clopp of the boots that I couldn't afford,
the smell of cigars on men's winter jackets,
eating handfuls of Ricicles straight from the packet.

I sleep in the sun with no sunscreen on
and buy slimming tablets though I know they're a con,
don't iron my clothes and I drink juice from the carton.
I've got no savings and I like Dolly Parton

I spend time on Facebook but don't finish Persuasion,
eat too much salt and I smoke on occasion,
messed up my finals because I didn't revise,
whinge to my mum but don't take her advice,

don't practice the piano though I said I would,
never go running though I really should.
I hate seeing the Doctor and watching the news
and I buy a new handbag when I have the blues.

I get really cross about things that aren't fair
and worry so much that I pull out my hair.
I can't get to sleep and then I can't wake up,
I blow dry my hair and I wear lots of makeup.

I get disillusioned with daily drudge.
I don't lose my temper but I can hold a grudge.
I listen to music which I know makes me cry
and often exaggerate, though I rarely lie

I use the hard sponge on pans that are non-stick
and confess all my sins even though I'm not Catholic.
I criticise colleagues when they are shirking
then write silly poems when I should be working.